by JAMES TARANTO
Thursday, January 10, 2002 2:38 P.M. EST

Ministry of Information
New York's firemen are called the "bravest," but it seems the Fire Department is utterly craven. The Weekly Standard's Beth Henary reports that the FDNY is rewriting history in order to satisfy "multitulcutural" sensitivities:

Firefighters Dan McWilliams, Billy Eisengrein, and George Johnson were captured in a now-famous photo, raising a flag, Iwo Jima-style, over the ground-zero wreckage. Copies of the photo--both legal and illegal--have spread throughout the world; the Record, the New Jersey paper that holds the copyright, is not enforcing it. So it would have seemed reasonable for the statue commemorating the moment, a model of which was unveiled on December 21, to have replicated the photo exactly.

Not so. At the request of the New York Fire Department, the sculptors who worked on the statue replaced McWilliams, Eisengrein, and Johnson--all white--with firefighters of three different races, because people of all races contributed to the rescue effort. While that is certainly true, the fact remains that it was those three firefighters who hoisted the flag. After all, the men depicted in the Iwo Jima monument, fashioned after another famous photo, are the individuals shown in the picture.

I Wanna Be Sedated
The first U.S. plane left Kandahar today carrying Taliban and al Qaeda prisoners to Guantanamo Naval Base in Cuba. "Enemy gunfire erupted as the plane took off," CNN reports. "U.S. Marines responded with M-16 rifle and machine gun fire, and two U.S. Marine Cobra helicopters lifted off as tracer fire criss-crossed the north end of the airport. The gunfire ended shortly after it began."

USA Today reports on the "unprecedented security measures" for the flights:

Sources said Wednesday that the prisoners will be chained to their seats and outnumbered roughly 2-to-1 by specially trained security guards. They will be flown to Cuba aboard Air Force cargo jets, each carrying 20 to 30 prisoners. The guards will carry stun guns rather than regular sidearms, which could cause the cabin to lose pressure if fired. The prisoners might be sedated, the sources said.

Good Golly, Somali
"Warlords from Somalia and terrorists linked to the al Qaeda network have been spotted moving from the failed African state to nearby nations," reports the Washington Times' Bill Gertz. "A group of Somalian Muslim guerrillas was spotted recently as they fled to Yemen, U.S. officials told The Washington Times," suggesting that they plan to use Yemen "as a staging area for guerrilla attacks if U.S. forces start military operations against al Qaeda terrorists in Somalia."

A reporter from London's Daily Telegraph visits the Somali town of el-Wak, said to be "a stronghold of al-Itihaad, a fundamentalist militia in America's sights" for its ties to al Qaeda. "We are not terrorists. We are innocent people," insists the local "district officer," but the Telegraph notes that "his protestations have met with derision from local militias in surrounding districts, many of whom say el-Wak is al-Itihaad's headquarters in the Gedo region, Somalia's largest concentration of the group's followers."

The British Connection
Scotland Yard has identified "substantially more than 100" Muslim terrorists belonging to groups connected with Osama bin Laden, London's Independent reports, quoting David Veness, head of Scotland Yard's specialist operations. "The police intended to make 'robust use of counter-terrorism laws' to bring to justice suspected members of illegal organisations in Britain, he said."

Deviating From the Norm
National Review editor Rich Lowry takes a well-deserved shot at Transportation Secretary Norman Mineta for his rote opposition to "racial profiling" as an element of airport security:

It is Mineta who takes the anti-profiling position all the way to its most absurd conclusion. "Surrendering to actions of hate and discrimination," he maintains, "makes us no different than the despicable terrorists who rained such hatred on our people."

Since Mineta thinks "discrimination" includes ethnic profiling, this must be one of the laziest statements of post-Sept. 11 moral equivalence this side of Susan Sontag.

Pretty in Tents
Yesterday's USA Today featured a first-person dispatch from Kandahar by a reporter who donned a burkha. (The wacky punsters at USA Today dub the article their "cover story.") The Christian Science Monitor had the same idea, though its reporter was in Kabul and her story came out a day later.

Both papers find that, despite the fall of the Taliban, most Afghan women are still covering up. "After five years under the Taliban-enforced burqa," the Monitor reports, "these women are waiting, they acknowledge, for someone to announce that it's OK to take off the once-mandatory covering, popularly known as chadori, which means tent."

USA Today notes that Afghan men aren't eager to see female faces: "In dozens of interviews here throughout December, no man said women should stop wearing burqas, even though the Taliban had been routed from Kandahar. . . . Their unwillingness to endorse a change didn't stem merely from the widespread support here for the Taliban. The burqa's place in Afghan society is more complicated and deeply rooted than that."

Saudi Sour Grapes
"A number of Saudis freed from US jails following weeks of detention after the Sept 11 attacks have claimed that they were maltreated and psychologically abused by the prison authorities," the Pakistani newspaper Dawn reports from Riyadh. One aviation student, Adel Al-Otaibi, told a Saudi newspaper: "Armed FBI agents raided my flat in Stamford, Fla. I was arrested like a murderer. They handcuffed me and put me in jail." Perhaps he'd have felt more at home if they'd chopped off one of his hands.

Prose and Konner
Joan Konner, erstwhile dean of the Columbia Journalism School, pens a rather silly piece for Newsday. We found her argument hard to follow, but she seems to be complaining that (1) the media in general are too patriotic, and thus insufficiently critical of President Bush, and (2) Fox News Channel in particular is "a blatantly biased, conservative news service, in contrast with "the more balanced news networks."

We're not sure we'd trust Konner's judgment about objectivity, however; the Drudge Report checked campaign-donation records and finds that Konner has given more than $4,000 to Bill Bradley's presidential campaign, the Democratic Congressional Campaign Committee, and the feminist-left groups Emily's List, Women's Campaign Fund and Faces of Change.

Speaking of Bias . . .
As we noted long ago, the Reuters news service claims it is so even-handed that it won't take sides on the question of whether the Sept. 11 atrocities constituted "terrorism." So our jaw dropped when we read the passage we've italicized below in a Reuters dispatch:

[State Department spokesman Richard] Boucher said the United States, which gives Israel about $2 billion a year in weaponry used to kill Palestinians, objected to the $100 million shipment to the Palestinians on the grounds that it contributed to the escalation of violence.

Saddam Hussein, Copyright Violator?
ABC News reports Jonathon Earl Bowser, a Canadian artist, is accusing Iraqi novelist Saddam Hussein of staling one of Bowser's paintings and using it on the cover of Saddam's first novel, Zabibah and the King. Bowser's efforts to enforce his intellectual property rights may be complicated, though, because the novelist has a second job as dictator of Iraq. We certainly hope Saddam will recuse himself from any official decisions in this matter, as he has an obvious conflict of interest.

Enronning Scared
The Justice Department has opened a criminal investigation of Enron, the Fortune 500 energy-trading company that filed for bankruptcy last month amid charges of massive bookkeeping irregularities and possible fraud. Enron employees have been hit particularly hard by the company's woes because Enron encouraged them to put much of their 401(k) money in company stock, which has lost most of its value. President Bush announced this morning that that he is ordering a review of pension regulations that might put employees of other companies at similar risk.

Democratic partisans are trying to turn this into a political scandal, though there doesn't seem to be anything to it other than guilt by association. The New York Times' Bob Herbert (link requires registration) illustrates the point with an angry denunciation of the Bush administration and Enron that includes no actual evidence of wrongdoing by either.

"No one knows yet the extent of the illegality--if any--that went on at Enron," Herbert concedes. But he professes outrage that Enron executives donated money (perfectly legally) to Bush's presidential campaign and quotes Charles Lewis of the self-described Center for Public Integrity as saying: "It just shows that this is a company inordinately dependent on government favors." Herbert offers not a scintilla of evidence, however, that there was any quo accompanying the quid. Herbert is also unhappy that Vice President Dick Cheney met with Enron executives while formulating the administration's energy plan--though again, there's no evidence Cheney was doing anything other than seeking advice from people knowledgeable about energy.

National Review's Byron York, noting that Rep. Henry Waxman has been pushing for an investigation of "the extent to which Enron may have influenced the Administration's energy policies or provided information about its own operations," offers some sensible advice:

The present clamor suggests that if the White House has anything--anything--it feels it should reveal about dealings with Enron, it should do so now. That doesn't mean giving in to Waxman, who not only has no committee power but also has no grounds to make demands after years of stonewalling investigations of possibly criminal wrongdoing in the Clinton administration (not just by supporters of the administration, but by administration officials themselves). Rather, the White House might ask [Rep. Dan] Burton or some other House committee chairman to make a formal request for information, which the White House could then supply in its response. All through the proper channels. In the months to come, the administration's enemies will certainly demand more and more disclosure; the White House might as well use its friends to get it done.

The Recesses of Washington
The Washington Times reports the White House is "seriously considering" recess appointments for Eugene Scalia as Labor Department solicitor and Otto Reich as assistant secretary of state for the Western Hemisphere. Senate Democrats have refused to allow a vote on either man's confirmation; a Wall Street Journal editorial late last month made the case for recess appointments.

Run, Al, Run!
Al Sharpton has been making noises about running for president in 2004, and we must confess to mixed feelings about the prospect. On the one hand, Sharpton is an irresponsible demagogue with a penchant for poisoning race relations. On the other hand--well, who can resist a good circus? George Will imagines the scene:

Picture the other candidates in 2004, mostly senators with their pretty red ties and not a hair out of place, decorously debating Sharpton, who talks like this: "In the language of the 'hood, Clinton pimp-slapped Jesse on Sister Souljah." Sharpton is talking about Clinton's 1992 criticism of a black rap singer to distance himself from, among others, Jackson. . . .

In his chalk-striped gray flannel he is more conservatively dressed than many in the Four Seasons hotel dining room. "I am conservative on everything but race," he declares with a straight face, a declaration somewhat vitiated by the fact that, for him, everything is race.

Sly, clever, witty, incapable of embarrassment and uninterested in the ceremonial politeness of national politics, Sharpton is going to have fun in 2004.

Homelessness Rediscovery Watch

"If George W. Bush becomes president, the armies of the homeless, hundreds of thousands strong, will once again be used to illustrate the opposition's arguments about welfare, the economy, and taxation."--Mark Helprin, Oct. 31, 2000

"It's Too Easy to Forget About the Homeless"--headline, Eugene Kane column, Milwaukee Journal Sentinel, Jan. 7, 2002

Monkeyfishing for Deer
We suppose we should have known it was too good to be true. Yesterday's item on Ohio deer hunters outsmarting the People for the Ethical Treatment of Animals turns out to have been a hoax. "PETA asserts that it has never outfitted deer with vests, nor ever made any plans to," says a press release from the organization. Snopes.com has added a page debunking the "urban" legend, and Bowsite.com, our source for the item, has issued a press release disclaiming responsibility.

Swallowing Our Pride
Yesterday's item on alleged terrorist threats against the San Onofre nuclear power plant erroneously placed the plant in San Juan Capistrano, Calif. In fact, it is in nearby northern San Diego County, though the suspect allegedly stored weapons in a storage facility in San Juan Capistrano.

Sauce for the (Silly) Goose
Ever wonder just what the European Union does? The Times of London reports that "a spectacularly obscure EU body" was to meet today "to decide just how many lumps a sauce can contain before it ceases to be classified as a sauce and is regarded officially as a vegetable":

The EU's maximum "lump limit" is currently set at 20 per cent. This was originated to stop importers avoiding high tariffs on vegetables by disguising them as sauces. . . .

Under culinary trends, this is not good enough for the saucemakers, who have their own pressure group--the wonderfully named Le Comité des Industries des Mayonnaises et Sauces Condimentaires de l'Union Européenne. It has told the European Commission that any lump limit is unacceptable. An industry source said: "If the lump threshold does rise that will be a help, but the whole system should be abolished. They should base the rules on what producers say they are making, and what consumers think they are buying." Market research shows consumers increasingly favour what are known in the trade as sauces with "textural interest".

"Just to add to the problem," the Times continues, "even a sauce containing meat can be classed as a vegetable if the meat content is less than about 18 per cent." At least that makes vegetarianism less unappealing.

Your Tax Dollars at Work
Rep. Lois Capps, a California Democrat, boasts in a press release that "she secured $50,000 for the Liberty Tattoo Removal Program of San Luis Obispo County in the final Justice Department Appropriations bill. . . . The funding will be used to hire a full-time program coordinator and for education to deter students from getting tattoos."

The release quotes Capps as saying: "People with tattoos often find themselves being unfairly stereotyped in a way that makes it difficult to find employment or be promoted to higher, better paying positions. The Liberty Tattoo Program works with people in our community to help erase this social stigma. I'm proud to work with this excellent local program to expand the services it can provide with the help of federal funds."

(Elizabeth Crowley helps compile Best of the Web Today. Thanks to C.E. Dobkin, Raghu Desikan, S.E. Brenner, Shelley Taylor, Michiel Visser, Christian Peck, Brit Hume, Chris Hayes, Steve Black, Adam Paris, Steven Platzer, Mary Flusche, Drew Parkhill, Seth Minster, Robert Owen, John Burtner, Robert Butchko, Brian Francouer, Mike Sierra, Richard Libby, Paul Music, Rich Shepard, Mark Morgan and Brian O'Donnell. If you have a tip, write us at opinionjournal@wsj.com, and please include the URL.)

Today on OpinionJournal:

• James Q. Wilson and Heather Higgins: The case for enlightened stereotyping (link requires registration).
• Kim Strassel: Sept. 11, the big picture.
• Claudia Rosett: Alan Greenspan, Sept. 11 and "The Lord of the Rings."